Welcome To The Vancouver Island Centre
For Emotionally Focused Therapy

  • Do you still love your partner but can’t remember how to communicate without having the same arguments again and again?
  • Does it feel as though the bond between you and your partner has faded?
  • Do you find that you avoid opening up to your partner because you just don’t feel that he/she hears what you have to say?
  • Do you feel alone in your relationship or that your partner doesn’t care about you the way he/she used to?

If you answer yes to any of these questions, Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) for couples can help you and your partner change negative patterns for good.  Relationships often start with an intense connection but over time the spark that initially attracted you to each other can fade or disappear and often you feel the connection to your partner goes with it.  EFT offers a way for couples of all ages to learn how to communicate in ways that bring you closer together by helping you understand negative patterns of communicating, allowing each of you to express thoughts and fears in safe and respectful ways and, finally, helping couples to feel more bonded and close again, or perhaps closer than ever before.
If you would like help to enjoy a healthier relationship by creating more secure and respectful bonds with your partner please contact us.




Creating-Connections-BadgeAn Introduction to EFT


People in happy relationships also tend to enjoy better overall physical health and well-being.  Research shows that marital satisfaction has been linked to better immune system functioning, recovery from illness and injury, and helps with the management of stressful situations.

The Three Stages:

1. Recognize Negative Patterns

In the first stage, the focus is on helping couples to better understand the negative patterns of interacting and communicating that they repeatedly get stuck in. In stage one, key goals include helping couples to:

  • Better understand negative patterns of communication
  • Better understand what underlying feelings feed into conflict
  • Experience less conflict
  • Experience “more space” to begin to talk more deeply about important topics in the relationship
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2. Create New Patterns

In the second stage, the focus is on creating new, more effective, and more emotionally satisfying ways of interacting and communicating together. Key goals include:

  • Helping each partner to see the other in a different, more understanding light
  • Helping each partner to feel more safe and secure in talking about very important things
  • Helping couples to feel more bonded and close again, or even closer than they ever have been
  • Helping couples to feel that sense of specialness and being valued again
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3. Clarity and Preparedness

In the third stage, the focus is on building upon the gains that have already been made, and applying them directly to more specific issues within the relationship. Key goals include:

  • Having a clear sense of the old, negative pattern of interaction and communication.
  • Having a clear sense of the new, positive ways of interacting
  • Confidence about having the skills and strategies to help maintain these positive interactions together
  • Feeling prepared to end therapy with a hopeful outlook for the future
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